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Vilehead
I made Antumbra. Sup?

Age 39, Male

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Sorma'Ksul

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Greenlight - Land of Hate

Posted by Vilehead - October 4th, 2015


Ehhhh... GameDev feedback at its finest. Steam alone makes me want to quit deving.
http://steamcommunity.com/workshop/filedetails/discussion/515370500/517141624285063085/?tscn=1443972333#c483366528916441992

In less then 2 days, I've been called all sort of names. Raging from fagots, to idiots, people telling me to die, people telling me that I am a disgrace to my family, people telling me that my 4yo son should commit suicide having a father like me.

So I started to delete those over-the-edge comments. Guess what? Apparently, I am forbidden from using the tools the Steam is providing me with. I am forbidden from deleting comments under my own Greenlight. At least that's what people on Steam said. And the outbreak started. So I started talking back.

And that was my next mistake.

Those people are like freaking sharks! The moment they get a smell of blood drop in the water they start swarming around you.

Never in my entire internet life I have encountered so much hostility and hate. Well actually I did. Once, on 4chan /r/. But that's a place you actually expect to boil with hatred. The worst part is that I am really not in a position to quit. But every particle of me wants to. But GameDev and GD related skills are all I have at this point. And I have a wife and 4yo son. Leaving the stage is not an option.

But bit by bit - I am starting to understand why Phil Fish (Being a total jerk he is) cashed and run after FEZ success. I am starting to hate what supposed to be my dream. I always wanted to make games, even as a kid. I've looked upon the game creators as they would be Gods. Ubersmiths of my dreams, which they weave into an interactive medium for me to play with. Being a betatester or getting an autograph was a privilege. And now... Its becoming the other way around.

The players feel like they are doing you a fucking favor that they'll play your game. Imagine that...

And some part of me really thinks this guy from the comment might be right. At this point, some part of me would actually enjoy a regular job. Even if it would be McDonald's. And believe me, if I would be alone and without a family - I think I would go for it. But at this moment of my life it can only be the Game Dev. Its the only way to fulfill the dreams of those I love and care for. My only ticket to a better future and a better life for my son. I life, I had no chance to experience. So I've came to you, to whine and cry. And after I am done here, writing thisĀ  - I will go back and take another gulp of this poisonous toxins.

Life sure is fun this day and age.
Isn't it?

BTW: No, I am not after your pity or advices. Just... wanted to vent. And maybe by doing so - warn people who are going Greenlight of what they might be dealing with.

Kudos


Comments

You can come play with us. We'll let you. :)

Plus, as a game maker, you can create a game where we get to attack the insulting comment leavers. Somehow. :3

Actually thats a cool idea lol. Maybe not steam material but for browsers why not hah

I think it would just be healthier for you to learn to just ignore the negative feedback that lacks any constructive criticism. I've noticed you can't help but reply to some reviews on your Antumbra game and poke at them because they said something like, "This suxs". Let it go man. I think you would be happier emotionally and mentally this way. Dealing with this kind of bullshit is unfortunately all part of the gig. While those useless critics and vulgar assholes waste their time leaving reviews/comments, we game devs are living a more fulfilling life as we plug away at our passion day in and day out :)

Yea I know mate :( I am kind of a disapointed about me. That every bloody time - I take the bait. I feel like a fucking looser after. But this can be done only two ways. You can either ignore the comment totally. Pretend they dont exist. Or read all of them. Because you can't tell which comment/review is constructive not before you actually read it. And once you read it - its too late. Its like a chain of boxes. But you don't know whats inside. And every now and then - a box contains a crap that fires at your face.

The people who like my creation and voice their opinion, or just those who brings some constructive criticism - Theyve spent time writing those. For me to read. And I owe them to read it. This way I can pay my respect. But reading what they have to say. But by doing so - I've also swim in a river of negative vomit, before I can reach those pearls. And I get pissed lol. And then I make an idiot out of myself >_>

Ech #firstworldproblems eh mate? :)

A little gem of (albeit corny) wisdom.
HATERS= Having Anger Toward Everyone Reaching Success

I highly doubt anyone of those commentators even have a lick of talent. What is the old (relatively) comment about hate posters on the internet? I think it goes "those in the most pain cry the loudest, not because they want help, but because they want to make others as upset as they are"

Now is Zits even close to the level that Antumbra is? NO, not even by a lightyear, but I get it, you need $$$ before anything else can be deved. If this were a perfect, or even decent, world you would have asstons (one ass ton is=10 shittons) of money to make any game you wanted. Sadly this is reality. So am I sad Zits is coming before A2? Immensely, but I blame funding issues, not you, never you =<

Please dont give up ;_;. We are counting on you so much. We will forgive hundreds of Zits if it means more Antumbras! You will not be another Van Gogh. Just give it time. If Antumbra proved one thing (other than to never pet snakes) it is that original games (masterpieces) can still come from Indie devs.

Think about it this way, you have a loving family, adoring (if finite in number) fans, and while it was in fact only $400 raised, it is far more than any of them will ever have. I say that is a better one up than any other possible response =>

Vent anytime you need to, we will listen =>

I am fucking love Shawn. And I mean it. You have no freaking idea how much it means to me that someone understands. This is not some PR mumbo-jumbo.

Life and the world - are shit. And shit sells. And Sells HARD. But!
If making shit is what I HAVE to do, in order to create wonders... so be it.
Bring it on. I will bite their heads off.

For you. For my son. For my wife. For myself. And for all those wonderful people I want to help.
I'll be a hooker, if thats what has to be done.
I will do the worst if it takes me even a bit closer to my destination.
And I'll get Antumbra 2 into history books.

This way or another.

Just do what you do, dude. Yeah, players are not too much sentimental if they don't like something and nobody care about your life and wife. And maybe you did something wrong. But anyway you in good position - you can create. So just do it again. I hope you at least have some love from your family :)
Good luck, bro.

As long as I have you guys behind my back - I'll manage. I will bring you Antumbra 2. Even if I have to whore myself.

I've heard about how bloodthirsty 4chan and Reddit are. Seems like that's the best place to see if your stuff can take some real, mindless bashing. You have more guts that I will ever, anyway. I for one would go into total hermit if that ever happened to me.
Keep strong, man. And Exedor has a good point.

As a guy that loved your work on Antumbra, I might not agree with the work you recently did, I can't be mad. In a way, I respect your decision to do this so that you can put food on the table for your family. I might not agree with the direction, I can respect the intention. As for how the behavior is on Steam Greenlight, the hate, the rudeness, the crassness of it all, I have one thing to say, that is not us. I could go on a tear describing my hatred for those kind of people, but if I did, I would probably require another post to fit it all. So instead, I'm going to post something that coincides with how I feel. Here ya go, don't let the worst parts of our community make you stop doing what you love. https://youtu.be/Dt9GwmOWoqo

thx for that link mate. Its actually brought some peace to my mind. I even left a comment.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dt9GwmOWoqo&lc=z12djf35psevyzh3v23aw31rpx2jxjft1

Frankly, I find it DISGUSTING that people are even bringing your little boy into this. Taking their issues out on a person who we all know is a solid, talented and imaginative guy through and through.
And the worst part is, everybody's walked through shoes like those at least once in their lives. We get criticised, we feel disrespected and want to go all Jessi Slaughter on them without even thinking of the consequences.
I've been down that road myself, and for the record, I hate all those people who are always like "Just Ignore It" or "Let it goooo, let it GOOOOOO!" because it's RUDE and IGNORANT. Of course you'd want to go off on all those little shits who egg and tomato Antumbra, and those people don't know how you feel about your blood, sweat and tears being attacked and panned.

That is the worst lesson of life; whatever you do, there will always someone who will think that what you do is bad and that they could do it better than you if they tried. But you know what? They never try, because they know that they suck at it. Whenever someone comments something hateful, wether IRL or online, don't hate back. Pity them, for once you are finished you will have created something artful, something to be proud of, and they will only have created a "UR MOM SO PHAT" joke so bad that not even MTV shows hosts will use them. Also, if you want to get a real comment of actual criticism (good or bad) for Antumbra, WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS GAME WHY AM I MOLESTING A SPECTRE MY EYES ARE MELTING AND I DON'T CARE. There. I love/feel weirded out by this game, and not many things weird me out these days.

"(...)joke so bad that not even MTV shows hosts will use them. "
Hhahahahah!!!! Briliant! :D And thank you Tirrene :) I am honored you joined our little gang here. Remember to also fire me a like on Facebook. Not because I masturbate to the Like counter on FB but because I am a lot more active there. So we can stay in touch.

Hey :D Long time no see! Don't take those 9 year olds seriously. From experience, Trolls and scum like those always try to feed off negative emotions and mistakes that the user/victim makes. To be honest, Greenlight on Steam is like a giant pile of crap; the worst of games get on there. I hope that people- the intelligent kind- find your game and raise it above the rest! It truly is a piece of art and I love finding games that are unique and have something deeper to it. Since I do have a Steam account, I'll rate it and give it a good review because you deserve it. I hope to see the next game sometime soon! (And good luck with it!)

Man, if someone made a game lampooning the terrible behavior that people exhibit on the internet I would play the hell out of that.

It is just ridiculous that people are such assholes...and I love that other people had the exact same idea as me for a game. Once you have some free time after Antumbra, You should put your talents to making a browser game on fighting hecklers.

Keep at it Drone!